⚖️ Settled Law

The great national debates, decided by Moose Mail readers. Once a ruling lands here, it is law. No appeals. (Well. Maybe in the comments.)

Case No. 006 · The Two Minutes Question

How will you spend the two minutes of silence, at a ceremony or quietly wherever you are?

⚖️ Verdict: The court finds there is no wrong place to keep the silence. At a cenotaph or at a kitchen table, poppy on or poppy in hand, two minutes of quiet is two minutes of remembering, and that is the whole of the law today.

Decided Wednesday, Nov 11, 2026. The court stood with Canada at 11 in the morning, poppy on, and kept the silence.

SETTLED

Case No. 005 · The Coffee Order Question

What is the correct coffee order, double-double or black?

⚖️ Verdict: Double-double. The court finds that black coffee is just hot bean water with confidence, and the double-double remains the law of the land.

Decided Tuesday, Nov 10, 2026. Black coffee was heard, respected, and overruled. The court takes its coffee the way Canada intended: two creams, two sugars, zero apologies.

SETTLED

Case No. 004 · The First Snow Question

The first snowfall of the season: pure magic or a personal attack?

⚖️ Verdict: Magic, for exactly one day. After that it is just weather, and the court will hear no complaints until February.

Decided Monday, Nov 9, 2026. The first flakes were met with wonder, hot chocolate, and one neighbour already hunting for the shovel he swore he put away somewhere obvious.

SETTLED

Case No. 003 · The Lights Question

Are Christmas lights okay before Remembrance Day?

⚖️ Verdict: Too early. The poppy comes first, and the lights can wait until November 12.

Decided Sunday, Nov 8, 2026. "Never too early" was heard and respectfully overruled. The court will be outside on the 12th, ladder in hand.

SETTLED

Case No. 002 · The Outing Question

Does a Timbits run count as a legitimate outing?

⚖️ Verdict: Yes. It is a legitimate outing. Pants are encouraged, but the court will not insist.

Decided Saturday, Nov 7, 2026. "Groceries, technically" was heard and respectfully overruled.

SETTLED

Case No. 001 · The Snack Question

Are ketchup chips an elite snack?

⚖️ Verdict: Elite. The elite-est, in fact. There is no third option.

Decided Friday, Nov 6, 2026, by Moose Mail readers, coast to coast.

SETTLED

Next Case Before the Court

Today's question is on the homepage, and the website vote is the one that counts. Results are revealed here tomorrow, together with the ruling. The court accepts new cases by email, and the court is easily persuaded.